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After two Spiegel best-selling books exploring the quirks of German culture, I find I've become somewhat of a pundit for German life. Unsure about my position, and with severe doubts about my expertise, I decided to take on a series of integration challenges. Unfortunately, the vast majority go horribly wrong. Readers will learn:
What happens when someone of no musical talent creates a Schlager song.
Why you shouldn't accept a ride from a Mitfahrgelegenheitvan containing a mattress and a cat with one eye.
What watching seventy hours of German TV in a week does to your health (and faith in humanity).
How to really annoy a Beamte.
Why it's not a good idea to Nordic Walk throughBallermann 6, Mallorca.
Why you shouldn't attend a Schützenfest if you can neither drink nor march.
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